As the year comes to an end and the holidays approach, the feeling of endings and new beginnings becomes more present.
For many of us, this season carries a mix of emotions : love and longing, gratitude and sadness, joy and grief existing side by side.
Grief has been on my mind lately.
On December 18th, we gathered to talk about grief over the holidays—how loss shapes us, how there are many kinds of loss, and how grief shows up differently for each of us.
We spoke about how grief lives not only in our minds or hearts, but in our bodies, and about ways to move through difficult moments with kindness toward ourselves and others.
Sometimes, being of service to someone else can be deeply healing and in those moments, we often become the benefactor too.
What became very clear was the importance of community. Of being together. Of having a place where our stories can be witnessed: our challenges, our suffering, our love, and our joy.
It was a meaningful and powerful time, and I’m deeply grateful to those who came. Most of us need spaces like this—places where we don’t have to carry everything alone.
That gathering stayed with me and brought me back to this question: how do we hold grief and joy at the same time?
December has been full for me—busy, rich, and more emotional than usual.
There have been moments of sadness and tears, not always tied to one specific thing, but to life and to losses that resurface. Loss doesn’t always arrive all at once. Sometimes it returns months or even years later, sparked by a memory, a smell, or a longing for conversation, presence, or touch.
And grief isn’t only about death. It comes in many forms : changing your world, leaving a job, stepping into a new chapter.
These transitions ask something of us. Sometimes the feelings simply need to come out. That has been true for me, and I believe it’s true for all of us.
So how do we hold both truths?
That grief and joy can exist together.
That we don’t have to crumble or disappear. That even when the road is difficult, it is still one we can navigate and that good things can come from it.
This season invites us to soften. To release the idea that we must protect ourselves from feeling loss or change, and instead anchor into the love that is still here.
There are people I deeply miss this year. During the holidays, I try to stay connected through small rituals, through memory, tradition, and food.
Baking things that remind me of my childhood, of my mother, of my parents’ traditions, helps anchor me.
Taste, smell, and simple practices can carry love forward. My mothers sausage rolls, nanaimo bars and my father potato salad and european wieners are a classic at Christmas time.
A special tree honouring my mothers love of Owls.
This is one way I understand holding grief and joy together allowing it all to exist. Because when we push grief away, we often limit the depth of joy available to us. We have to feel the feels and let them move through the body.
One of the strongest insights from our grief gathering was this: loss and trauma show up in the body first. Tightness in the chest. Pain in the gut. Illness. We need ways to let it move—through tears, movement, breath, meditation, shaking, talking, or simply being witnessed. And we need love and support around us.
We are not meant to do this alone.
As you move through this season, here are a few gentle reminders. Take only what feels right:
Let go of perfection. Focus on what truly matters.
Listen to your body—it will guide you.
Allow moments of grief without judgment. They don’t cancel joy.
Reach out. If you feel alone, someone else likely does too.
Be kind to yourself. Kindness is essential.
As we move into January, I’ll be offering a new workshop series focused on values and vision. How what we believe, what matters to us, and what we want can come into alignment. Dates aren’t confirmed yet, and I’ll share more in the next newsletter, but it will be a meaningful opportunity to create from a grounded place.
For now, my wish for you is simple.
May you have a peaceful, restorative holiday. May you care gently for your body, mind, heart, and emotions. And may you remember that there are still many beautiful things ahead.
I know this to be true. Please keep reminding yourself of that.
With warmth and care, Marianne
Staying Connected
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